When I was awake at 2:30 this morning, I had this whole entry worked out in my head, but now I forgot it, so I'll start over.
I woke up because that's what I do; I haven't slept a whole night through in years and years, that I can remember, without benefit of artificial sleeping aid, and I'm not doing that anymore. So I was up at 2:30, went to the bathroom, went back to bed. And then the symphony began.
Q apparently decided that since one of us big creatures was clearly awake, it must be morning, and therefore, time for Q to eat. She sat outside the bedroom door crying for about a half hour. From time to time she would hurl her fat little cat body at the door, so it sounded like tiny burglars were trying to break into the house.
Then, as the sinus headache began to posess me, Linda Blair-like, I took action, leaped out of bed, and locked Q in R's empty room. Okay, so I haven't leaped, exactly, since about 1974, but I hauled my creaky hip and aching back out of bed in a desperate plea at sleep-preservation. Back in bed, I put the one hear that hears deep into the pillow, and sighed. It was just me and my headache, settling in for what remained of the night.
Then I heard it, the sound of molars grinding each other into grape-nuts. I tried harder not to hear. I reached behind me and turned on the soothing sound machine, and the brook began to babble.
(By the way, here's how I got the sound machine. One winter, I kept the fan on in the bedroom all night every night, me, who's been cold since the age of 12. I explained to Hubs that the sound was soothing, when I really only used it to cover the crunching sounds of his teeth grinding as they blend with the good old American snores. So he bought me an ambient sound machine for my birthday so I could turn the fan off. Aww.)
I began to lament that we own no ice picks, as I wanted desperately to jam one into my good ear. No wait, bad idea. I wanted desperately to jam an ice pick into Hubs' ear. Not that I want him deaf; I just want him to STOP!
Alas, it was not to be. It has been thus for 25 years. He can sleep through anything, including, it seems, the destruction of his own teeth and nasal passages. I, on the other hand, can be awake for days and then not fall asleep in my own bed. I do love irony, but this just sucks.
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I'm watching
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