I am not going to work tomorrow because I am having a mammogram. So it's a sick day but I can take it in advance because I'm having a legitimate medical procedure, so that counts. I've said for quite some time that I won't be in on the 8th, so that the SCM knows not to schedule a lot of classes for that day, or be out himself, or whatever. But I never mentioned to him what I was doing, because it's none of his business, and of course, this.
So when he said to me "Are you planning something fun for tomorrow?" because he can't bear not to know everything, I just said, "No, I'm having a mammogram." Because clearly, that was the moment when I lost my mind.
He started in on how awful mammograms are for his wife, and I just kept saying, "Well yeah. Well, yeah," because he somehow thinks his wife's mammogram experiences are worse than anyone else's could possibly be. He felt the need to tell me that she puts it off because she dislikes it so, but she really does have to go soon. He drives me BATSHIT! How is it that one � well, man, can be so �. okay, SELF-CENTERED?
Now I know I shouldn't be playing these stupid games with him, but it's practically impossible not to, you know? So I figured it was time to play my trump card and remind him why I am very careful to go every year.
"Well, you know, my mother died of breast cancer."
And without missing A BEAT, he replies, "Oh, well of course, so did mine."
I blinked. And I blinked again. And I said, "What does that have to do with your wife scheduling her mammograms?" because that was the context in which it was said. He didn't get it. So I reminded him that his mother's breast cancer, although clearly the tragedy that such a thing would always be, did not impact on his wife's personal need for mammograms. That would be one helluva DNA strand.
So now he got it. Man. I just don't want to talk about such things with him, ever. I should have told him I was taking the day off for a mani/pedi at a spa. I must remember that for next year.
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I'm watching Gilmore Girls
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Sweet Sorrow - 06.12.2007
So ... - 12.19.2006
Christmastime Is Near - 12.18.2006
Fifteen Years - 12.17.2006
A Message From Our Sponsor - 12.16.2006
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