As it so happens, I didn't feel well most of the day Saturday, and decided that the two reasons for that were that I a) am a hypochondriac and b) was having a heart attack. I was not having a heart attack. But it was on my mind a lot, as in, just my luck to have a heart attack during a blizard. I better not tell anyone! Although I did tell the Sibs early in the evening, and I felt better after that.And I don't feel any of that stuff today, only other stuff, like tension in my stomach, where tension belongs.My health concerns today are not so much with me, but mostly with little Q the cat, who is not at all well. She's not eating now, and I'm sure is losing more weight because, well, let's just say that she is. I'm feeling that we are looking at the end for her in the near future. Maybe this is just pessimistic me talking, I don't know. I guess we'll see what happens in the days to come.
The snow has finally stopped here. I think the Hubs shoveled for about five hours altogether. We probably had 20" or more here; I know that they said on TV that this is the second highest snowfall ever recorded in New York City, which is maybe only ten miles away. I always worry when he shovels, too; remember, this is the man who hasn't seen a doctor since the seventies. And I'm not kidding.
Another one of my stress factors has been not getting an email response from K since Thursday, even though I had written to her on Friday, and again on Saturday. My baby in a big city during a storm! I wasn't freaking out, exactly, but I am not good with this kind of thing. I got email from her late this morning: did I forget that she had plans to be in Baltimore for the weekend? Ah ... well .... yes, I did. Where she was not likely to check her email every five minutes. Stupid, stupid, stupid! On the other hand, it's like six hours later and she could have called by now.
As I say, I am my own worst enemy.
The Sibs mentioned something about anti-anxiety meds. While I am not opposed to this philosophically, I must admit that I am reluctant to go there. In part, because I tried one a few years ago -- not long before my mother died -- and I did not react well to it. I realize that the doctor wouldn't give me the same one, but still, the memory lingers. And then, I am already taking a lot. I think I am already taking too many meds, but I don't know what I would ask to have cut out, y'know? Each change to the mix takes another whole adjustment, and I don't think that would reduce my anxiety. What I need to reduce, first of all, are the things that cause anxiety, like the possible dying cat and my kids driving to Toronto next weekend. I think I will be waaaaaay better after that one. Maybe all I've got to do is hold one another week.
They've called a delayed opening of school for tomorrow; the principal called me a half hour ago to post it on the website. Which I'm glad he did, because the phone chain is moving slowly and I haven't gotten my call via the regular channels yet. Used to be that was my only notification, but this principal calls me himself right away, which is way better. (Years ago, I would actually get the very first call in the school district, because when the FIL was Superintendent of Schools and it was his decision to make, he would be calling the police to tell them first and the MIL would pick up the other line and call me right away. Heh heh.)
I watched Kinsey today. Weird flick. I tried to watch Eat Drink Man Woman, because I wanted to see something else directed by Ang Lee, but I couldn't follow the subtitles and the story and Q. But now she's sleeping on the bed where the Hubs is resting after shoveling, and I'm watching To Kill a Mockingbird on TMC. Is that not one of the best movies ever? And one of the best books?
I'm so tired of my feet being cold. I'm just rambling now.
I did want to say, though, that I saw someone reporting on the storm earlier today from Plymouth Harbor in Massachusetts, and I'm sending good vibes up there to summer-gale. Hope the storm wasn't too bad for all my New England buddies.
