Since the real Friday Five is off this week, I made up my own.
1. How many people of indeterminate gender did you talk to today?
Just one. And I cheated and looked at her name, so I know it was a girl, although there were no other clues whatsoever. And when Colleague made a reference to "he", the little freshman girl just shrugged and smiled. I think it must happen to her all the time. Funny, once I knew she was a girl, I could see that she didn't seem masculine at all, there just weren't any obvious clues to distinguish this fourteen year old girl from the average fourteen year old boy. Last week's person of indeterminate gender turned out to be a fourteen year old boy, but I had to see his name in a couple of places to believe it. Then I could see that he maybe looked like a ten year old boy, but one with a girl's haircut and, oh yeah, breasts. He wasn't especially feminine either, but man, does he need to work on those pecs.
2. What is the most repulsive toy you have ever seen? The most amusing?
When my nephew J1 (now 29) was about four, he had this thing called Stretch Armstrong, which I've seen lately on commercials, so maybe it's coming back. Or I might have just seen it on VH1's "I Love the 70s." Let's keep a good hope. Anyway, you could pull his arms or legs out from his body and they just kept stretching and stretching. Grossed me out totally.
But then we got him this amazing cool thing: Hulk muscles. It was like a green plastic life-vest, and he would put it on under a shirt, with a pump hanging out the back. Then he would flex his little four year old arms, and secretly pump up on the thing in the back and the muscles would fill up with air, and get bigger and bigger, pushing out the shirt and, if he wore the right shirt, looking all green, like he was turning into the Incredible Hunk. Theatrical even then, he knew how to play this up great. It was the cutest thing you ever saw. If they ever make Hulk muscles again -- and maybe they do now -- quick, go buy them for a little kid.
3. Have you ever named your car? If so, what? If not, why not?
Never have I done this, at least, not until yesterday, although both my kids always named their cars. R's first car, which had been my mother's, was therefore named Shirl. The next one was Phineas. K's car is named Bonnie. I never named my car because, really, it's a little strange, no? Then yesterday I was thinking about how bonded I am with this car and how I expect to keep it for years to go yet, and before I knew it, I had named the car Buddy.
Some years ago, when I was driving my kids and J2 and J3 to day camp (where I also worked) in my red station-wagon, the camp had a contest to name your bus or whatever vehicle you came to camp in. So we called the car The Strawberry Alarm Clock, but it never caught on.
4. What time do you go to sleep every night? What time would you really like to go to sleep every night?
I try to go to sleep around ten, but sometimes 9:30 or so.
Most nights, I'd like to go to sleep around five, maybe six. P.M.
5. Do you believe in magic, or omens, or good luck charms? If so, describe and explain a charm or superstition that you really, really believe in.
OH NO, I AM A VERY RATIONAL PERSON. I BELIEVE IN SCIENCE, AND LOGIC, AND KNOWLEDGE.
I also believe with all my being that if I sleep under a plaid blanket, then I will be protected from random snake attacks all through the night.
So much for science.
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I'm watching The Golden Girls
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